


Little Bird

by DianaandAlicia



Series: SPD Stories [2]
Category: Fear the Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: Ableism, Alicia is a loving and understanding girlfriend, Althea has a sensory processing disorder, Althea's older brother is a horrible person, F/F, Stim Toys, Stimming, meltdowns, the r word is used a couple times, tw disability slurs
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-04
Updated: 2019-01-04
Packaged: 2019-10-04 06:27:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,810
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17299469
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DianaandAlicia/pseuds/DianaandAlicia
Summary: A trip back home for the holidays doesn't go as planned.





	Little Bird

**Author's Note:**

> Hi Y'all! Alright so this story is kinda like the other one where Al has a spd. I want representation for myself in fanfic so there will be more of these. While these stories are based off of experiences that I've had in my life, the events in this story haven't actually happened to me. I just wanted to write about some of the ways I come back from a meltdown, and what it's like to not have an understanding family member. All of the stims Althea uses are ones that I use also.
> 
> So yeah, I hope you enjoy it!

Alicia was gripping the steering wheel as she drove, her hands starting to hurt. She kept her facial expression neutral, despite the anger that she was feeling inside. As she drove on the highway, she quickly looked back in the rear-view mirror and saw Althea sitting in the backseat, looking worse for wear. 

Her face was red from humiliation and sadness, tear tracks visibly running down her cheeks. She was crying and Alicia wished that she could pull over and give Al a hug, but it would have to wait the rest of the twenty minutes it took to get home. 

It was the Monday after Thanksgiving, and the girls had been in Phoenix, visiting Althea’s parents. The girls had arrived the day before the holiday and the long weekend went mostly ok. 

Earlier in the morning however, Al was looking for her chewy stim necklaces that she brought in her little backpack. Everything went downhill when she and Alicia found out that Jacob, Althea’s older brother, snooped through her stuff and found her oral stim toys.  

Jacob was never accepting of Al’s stims, and the girl often got berated as a child for using them. He taunted and teased, her, calling her retarded more times than she could keep track of. Jacob had made it clear that Althea was an embarrassment to him and the family, even if her mother, father, older sister Emily, younger brother Kyle, and younger sister Tessa never felt that way.  

Even though Al is now an adult, and she and Alicia bought those objects with their own money, Jacob thought that Al only stimmed for attention and she didn’t really need those objects. 

Al and Alicia found out that Jacob had taken the oral stim toys, every single one of them, and threw them out in the garbage bin. By the time the girls heard this information, the garbage truck had already come by and those stim toys were long gone, on their way to the landfill. 

Al was on the edge of a meltdown after that, and Alicia grimaced as she went over the words Jacob had said to his little sister. 

“You’re not a god damned baby Al! You don’t need baby toys! If you keep acting like this, Alicia will leave you. She doesn’t want a retarded burden that she has to take care of, she wants a girlfriend. A burden. That’s all you’ve ever been to this family. You don’t deserve Alicia.” 

Those words from Jacob are what pushed Al over the edge, causing a meltdown, complete with crying and kicking and screaming. It didn’t help that the holiday weekend took a lot out of Al and her senses took a hit with the new routine and different setting. 

Since Phoenix is where everyone in Al’s family lived, over fifty people attended Thanksgiving dinner. Grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins from both sides of the family were there, along with Al’s immediate family. Also, since everyone was getting older, many of Al’s cousins were married and had children of their own. Althea was even an aunt, Emily had two daughters and a son all under the age of five, and Tessa had a baby boy. Kyle and his fiancé were expecting a little girl by February so there were a lot of new additions running around the house. 

After supper, when most of the family left, Althea had to stim for two hours straight in order to feel better and the next day was much worse. Emily, Tessa and Al’s mom begged Al and Alicia to come Black Friday shopping with them and Al reluctantly went, despite Alicia suggesting that going to the mall on the busiest shopping day of the year wasn’t a good idea. 

Al tried her hardest to hold herself together during shopping but it was so hard. Everything was loud and bright, and there were people everywhere, it was so bad Althea eventually had a meltdown in the parking lot of the last store that they went to. Luckily this happened on the way out of the store and she was able to cry and stim on the car ride home and in her bedroom at the house. 

Althea had depended on her oral stim toys for most of the weekend and Alicia wanted to yell and curse out Jacob for what he said but she knew if she did that, it’d only scare Al and make the situation worse. So what Alicia did instead, was take Al to the guest room and finished packing, leaving without saying goodbye. Both of Al’s parents had already went to work by the time this happened so Alicia made a point to call them later and explain what happened, especially since the girls originally had planned to stay until the next morning. 

The two had been in the car for six hours already and it broke Alicia’s heart at the fact that Al’s been crying for that long. It wasn’t loud crying, Al got most of that out by the time they’d been driving for an hour. Now it was just tears silently running down her face, with hitched breathing and sniffles, followed by hiccups here and there. 

Alicia was more worried about when they got home. Even Al’s more serious meltdowns and crying fits didn’t last this long. Six hours was a new record, a record that Alicia really didn’t want set. 

When they finally arrived home, Alicia took the suitcase in and quickly unpacked the car before getting to Al. When she opened the back door, she quietly unbuckled her girlfriend’s seatbelt and brushed a couple tears away with her thumbs.

“Are you ready to go into the house my love?” She asked, wanting Al to take her time. 

Al nodded and Alicia helped her out of the car, wrapping her up in a hug as they stood in the driveway. 

Alicia then gently and slowly led Al into the house and sat with her on the couch in the living room. 

After sitting for a few minutes, Al broke the silence, her first words in over six hours, shaky and sad. 

“I never wanna see him again.” 

Alicia nodded and pulled her into a hug. 

“I completely understand. Your brother crossed a line. If you don’t want to see or communicate with him ever again, you don’t have to. Do what you feel is best for your health.” 

Alicia knew that Al was still upset, and this decision wasn’t final. She also knew that whatever Al decided, she’d be there for her every step of the way no matter what. 

“Sweetie, I just wanted you to know, you are not, and never will be a burden to me. You are one of the best parts of my life and I love you so much. You’re my love and nothing Jacob ever says or believes is going to change that.” 

“I love you too.” Al said quietly, scooting closer to Alicia. 

“Tomorrow, we can go online and buy new necklaces, identical to the ones you had. It’s 7:00 and we had a long day. I was thinking of making pizza for supper, and then getting you a bath and in bed. Does that sound ok?” 

Al nodded and hugged her blanket close to her.  

“Do you want any medicine?” Alicia asked, knowing that Al might have a headache from crying for so long. 

“No. I’m good.” 

“Ok. If you need some you know where it is. I do want you to drink some water, since you cried for a long time, staying hydrated prevents headaches.” 

Al nodded and got up, going to the kitchen to get some water. Alicia followed close behind, opening the freezer and pulling out a pizza. While Al drank her water and Alicia made the pizza, the kitchen was still with silence. That was something that Althea liked about their relationship. Alicia understood that sometimes, especially after a meltdown, she didn’t want to talk. Althea was never required to talk to or answer Alicia and the girls were comfortable with silence. It was never awkward for them. They could sit in the same room for hours on end and not have to talk and it’d still feel perfectly normal. 

After the pizza was gone, Alicia sent Althea upstairs to the bedroom while she took care of the dishes. Once that was done, she went upstairs and smiled, seeing Al sitting on the bed flapping her hands. 

“Alright Little Bird, do you need some more stim time or would you like to take a bath now?” 

“Stim bath?” 

“Yeah. Totally.” Alicia said, nodding her head. “You can stim in the bathtub, that’s fine.” 

Althea nodded and kept flapping her hands while Alicia got up to get Al some pajamas. 

“Do you want to take a shower first to clean up, and then you can relax with a bath bomb once you’re clean?” 

“Yes please.” 

“Would you like any help or company? Or do you want to do this by yourself?” 

“Um, can I be by myself when I shower and then you keep me company when I do the bath?” 

“Sure thing. Take your time with your shower, I’ll be in here on the computer until you want me.” 

“Ok.” 

Althea got off the bed and went into the bathroom and it wasn’t long before Alicia heard the shower turn on. While Al showered, she turned her laptop on and went through her emails. 

Alicia poked around on her computer for twenty minutes before she heard Al turn the shower off and start to fill the bathtub with water.  

“‘Licia you can come in now.” She called after turning the water off. 

Alicia shut the laptop and got up, going into the bathroom. When she opened the door, she saw Althea already sitting in the tub, the bath bomb already put in the water. 

“I see you went with pink today. Good choice.”  

Althea gave Alicia a sad smile but refused to look at her. 

“Althea, my love, how are you feeling?” 

When Al didn’t respond, Alicia sat down on the side of the tub and tucked her finger under Al’s chin. She tilted Al’s head up so the girl would look at her. 

Her eyes were rimmed red and bloodshot from her tears and Alicia paused when she saw that tears were starting to well up again. 

“Oh Honey. Talk to me Sweetie.” She pleaded, wiping a tear away that had escaped down Al’s cheek. 

“‘Licia?” 

“Hmm?” 

“Why do you love me? Jacob’s right. I’m just retarded.” 

“What? No Baby. I never want to hear you refer to yourself like that ever again. You may have differences from others but you know that your brother only uses that word to make you feel bad. He’s not right, and he’ll never be right. You wanna know why? Because frankly, he is full of shit.” 

“But—” 

“I’m not finished yet. You asked me why I love you. I love you because of your big heart and how compassionate and kind you are. You’re a faithful girlfriend and such a good person. I love you for you, Althea. Your sensory processing disorder has no effect on my love for you, and it never will. Do you understand me?” 

Al looked away so Alicia asked again. 

“Althea, I said, do you understand me, my love?” 

Al nodded and sniffled, wiping her nose on her arm. 

“Good.” Alicia whispered, getting up from where she was sitting on the side of the tub and walking over to the sink. She grabbed a couple tissues from the box and brought them back over to the tub. 

“Let’s dry your eyes Baby. It’s all gonna be ok, I promise.” 

After Al’s eyes were wiped and her nose was blown, the two girls sat in silence for a while, until Alicia decided that it would be best if Althea got out. 

While Al was drying herself off, Alicia heard the phone ring, so she left the bathroom and went to answer it. 

“Hello? Oh, hi Linda……” 

Althea looked towards the door when she heard that. Linda was her mom. She quickly dried herself off as she strained her ears to hear the conversation that Alicia was having with her mother, but her girlfriend had gone into another room and it was hard to grasp what she was saying. 

Al quickly put on an oversized t-shirt and walked down the hall, eavesdropping when she really shouldn’t have been. 

“…...yeah. No, she cried the entire way home. Jacob saying all those things this morning really rubbed her the wrong way……” 

Al stayed hidden behind the hall so Alicia wouldn’t see her and started to get nervous again. 

“……. Totally. I’ll make sure to have her call you tomorrow. Thanks for everything this weekend Linda, it was nice seeing you……” 

“…. Yep. Uh huh. Talk to you soon. Goodbye.”  

After Alicia hung up, Al could hear her sigh. 

“I know you’re in the hall Althie. Come here.” 

Al immediately walked into the room Alicia was in and felt an instant warmth of comfort. 

“That was your mother. I explained what happened this morning and I told her that you weren’t really up to talking right now. You’ll need to call her tomorrow.” 

Al nodded in understanding and went over by Alicia for a hug. After their embrace, Alicia grabbed the hem of the t-shirt and pulled it up quick only to see that Al wasn’t wearing any underwear. 

“Althea?” 

“Yeah?” 

“How about you finish getting dressed and then we hit the hay? It’s time for bed.” 

“Can I stay up for a bit?” 

“Why? You need your sleep Birdie.” 

“I wanna stim.” 

“Ok. Stim for as long as you’d like, but when you feel that you’ve had enough, I want you to go to sleep.” 

Althea nodded and immediately started to flap her hands as the two walked toward the bedroom. As Alicia went into the bathroom to brush her teeth, Al giggled to herself and flapped harder.  

She loved it when Alicia called her “Little Bird” or “Birdie.” They were nicknames that only Alicia was allowed to call her, since she came up with them. 

Alicia started to call Al the nicknames after she saw her stim by flapping her hands for the first time, noting that the girl looked like a bird about to take off. The names stuck and they always made Al feel warm and giggly whenever Alicia called her them. 

After a little while, Al could hear Alicia turn the shower on and she stopped flapping her hands. She decided to get under the covers and looked around for her chewy necklaces, wanting to do her sucking and chewing stims before going to sleep.  

Another batch of tears started to spring up in her eyes when she remembered that she couldn’t do those stims, because her chewy stim toys were somewhere at the landfill in Phoenix. 

Disgruntled, Althea put her thumb in her mouth and started to suck on it, the soothing motions calming her down. She knew Alicia detested thumb sucking, saying it was unsanitary, but Al hoped she would let it slide, at least until the chewy toys could be replaced. She also grabbed her baby blanket and snuggled it close to her, finding a calming comfort in the object. 

Because Al’s weekend took a lot out of her, the thumb sucking, blanket cuddling and the constant sound of the water stream from the shower lulled her to sleep quickly, and she was out like a light by the time Alicia came in with a towel on her head. 

When Alicia walked into the bedroom, she smiled at the sight before her. Althea looked precious, and finally at peace. Alicia knew that her girlfriend would sleep like a rock tonight, because they were in a familiar and safe room and the long weekend had finally come to a close. She also took notice of Al’s thumb sucking but she decided to not bring it up later on, knowing that Althea was only doing it because it was all she had. Once they bought some new stim toys she’d probably stop. 

After drying and brushing her hair, Alicia got into bed next to Althea, smiling to herself when her girlfriend subconsciously scooted herself closer to her. Alicia cuddled Al close and kissed her hair, smiling again when the girl’s body went slack against her, all signs of tension and stress gone. This gave Alicia hope, knowing that even though the weekend wasn’t the best, everything was starting to go back to normal and it was one of the greatest reliefs that she felt, knowing her girlfriend felt safe in her arms. 

As Alicia fell asleep, she snuggled Althea closer to her, and it was nothing but peaceful in their quiet bedroom.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading, I hope you liked it!


End file.
